Week 4: A Crisis in Confidence

A memorable movie moment for me was a montage from the Disney movie, Miracle (movie montage linked here). I am a history teacher, and this particular montage includes the speech given by Jimmy Carter on July 15, 1979 (linked here). The public was disappointed in the message that Carter delivered that night, but looking back at a speech with my twenty-first-century perspective, I see wisdom from a man that dedicated his life to public service as a Washington outsider but was hurt by the armchair quarterbacks of the day. This speech is known as the "Malaise" speech as it described Carter's feelings about America's lack of initiative to band together to solve the nation's energy crisis. Malaise is the most perfect word to describe how I feel about the school year up to this moment.

Malaise is defined by dictionary.com as "a condition of general bodily weakness or discomfort, often the onset of disease"; or "a vague or unfocused feeling of mental uneasiness, lethargy, or discomfort". 

I feel malaise because I only see a maximum of ten students at a time. When I see these students, they are afraid to speak to me and to others. Even my most dynamic and engaging lessons fall flat because we must remain socially distanced. 

I feel malaise because I have students at home that I only know by an avatar.

I feel malaise because I have been asked to do more at a time when everyone is pushed to the max.

I feel malaise because my profession and all that are a part of education are being stretched too thin in a system where lawmakers call the shots.

I feel malaise because my students and my coworkers are hurting.

I feel malaise for parents that have few options for helping children and are forced to make tough decisions regarding work and child care. 

I feel malaise because one side or the other is constantly pitting Americans against each other. 

I feel malaise because it is easier to scroll through social media than to engage in difficult conversations, and having disagreements leads to judgments in character rather than a difference in opinion. 

I feel malaise because I don't know where to turn for guidance, as leadership in almost every capacity is corrupt, inept, and misguided. 

I feel malaise because we have failed to come together as a nation to solve problems. Look, forty years ago Jimmy Carter was calling out America's lack of unity. What has changed? Substitute the energy crisis of the late 1970s to just about any social issue that still haunts our nation. Inequality? Racism? Climate Change? What has changed?

I feel malaise today, and I fear that this malaise is here to stay. We are living through another crisis in confidence.